Unless you have facilities available to you like the one in the picture, at some time or other you may be confronted with the awful possibility that nature will call you when you're least able to answer. Like at 8 miles in to your long run, for example.
It happens.
If it's simply a pee that you need, that's pretty straightforward obviously. Especially for us guys. If, however we're talking No.2 then we're all in the same boat, and it's a bit more tricky.
I suggest the following strategy.
- Go before you go. Prevention is better than cure after all. Failing that, read on.
- Move past self-denial. If you think you can hold on, it's 50/50. You could be wrong, and you need to prepare for the next step. Failure at this point could end very, very badly for you. It's a long, uncomfortable walk home.
- Remove headphones (you need all your senses available), look around for a suitable spot. Away from prickly bushes or nettles. Don't forget to pause your stopwatch too. This really shouldn't be counted as run time.
- When you're sure nobody's coming, whip down the tweeds, do the thing. Keep clothing clear of the blast zone.
- If you don't have tissue paper with you (who the hell carries tissue paper on a run anyway?) you'll have to improvise. Dock leaves work well, or even a handful of grass. Poison Ivy less so. Whatever you use, it won't be pretty, so don't worry about it.
- Fasten up, headphones on, start watch. Carry on as if nothing has happened.
My own unfortunate experience in this area (more recently than I care to confess to) involved the use of frozen grass at step 5. Not pleasant.
This bloke trying to work it all out.
Comments 0 Comments